Monday, July 9, 2007

What Doesn’t Make You Stronger Will Kill You

Erin’s Family: One. Erin’s Self Esteem: Zero.

Hmm, remind me again why I go home to visit my family? Ah, yes, because sometimes I go entire days without wanting to open up my wrists with a razor in a warm bath of my own blood.

I really *do* love my family, and even more so from a distance. However, whenever I go home, I am just reminded that I am one of the “elite” members of the “Z” family, known for their loyalty, superiority of nature, hand-to-hand combat techniques, and keen ability to crush you with a compliment (e.g.: “You have such a pretty face… it’s a shame you hide it beneath all that weight.” -or- “That’s the great thing about Erin … You never have to worry about leftovers.”).

The good thing about my family is that I know that I can really rely on them for anything… Which, given certain family members predilections for soldiering and militia-esque gun collection, includes weapons with which to kill my enemy and a mass grave to bury them in.

PHOTO: It's just not a family affair without a trip to the friendly neighborhood gunshop to check out new assault rifles and the seminar on converting semis to full auto.

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